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Finished today at 9:30am. Yeah, so we only worked for one hour and fifteen minutes. Sue us :-) All the guys on my course here went to Bournemouth beach to letch at the girls. Whilst not adverse to that, the most unanimous of male behaviours, I felt it too much to specifically go somewhere for ten hours letching on accuont of actually having a wonderfully insane girlfriend to whom I'm committed. Incidental letching is fine and normal (and next to unstoppable), but doing it intentionally would make me feel guilty. Anyway. Went shopping in Salisbury which was nicer and more useful than I thought it would be. Found some black jeans, you see. Last time I found black jeans they were only available in girly cut, so I got my gf a pair. This time they were only in medium/big sizes, so I got myself some :-) Also bought a medium-tight (black) tshirt to use when I don't fancy gay-tight or groggy-loose. And bought all five Hellraiser movies. Hellraisers One and Two feel like a spiritual home for me; like a big black duvet of comfort and familiarity. Panning up to see the glory of Leviathan is my unholy equivalent of religious ecstasy. Then went to the gym, where I done 30 minutes hard cycling and some work with weights. I'm pleased I wrote a few days ago about gym stuff and was talking to tangy_apple (thanx babe, you inspired me!) 'cos I was then motivated to do the most simple upper-body exercises... weights! No fancy machine or anything. Just lifting heavy things up and down :-) Keep It Simple, Stupid! 2005 August Edit: Have now created a website about hellraiser: http://www.vexen.co.uk/hellraiser/index.htmlTags: black jeans, bournemouth, cycling, girls, gym, hellraiser, letching, leviathan, salisbury, shopping, tangyapple, weights, work, workmates
Current Mood:  accomplished
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I chose my job, apart from the genuine desire to work for Europe, to get close to "normal" people. But I hate it. I work with the lowest scum of the Earth. My workmates epitimize trash culture at its worst, I'm actively insulted and attacked for owning books that aren't SAS biographies, for being interested in how things work and for being, basically, intelligent and sensible. The kids here go out and get drunk every weekend, the only knowledge they have of Germany outside of our large work premises is where the pubs and brothels are. They are the worst of the worst, giving England a bad name whilst at the same time our job (collectively) is to promote harmony worldwide (with a British-interest bias, of course). I don't drink much, but this lot make me want to go T-total! I am learning a lot from them about the mass of humanity that I normally stand above. That's what I want - to be able to live effectively amongst the mundanes, even the worst mundanes, the racists, the violent, the criminals and worst of all, the morons and stupids, live among them so I learn how to deal with them better. Well I've learned a lot. But as far as fitting in goes, I'm the philosopher amongst violent degenerates, Simon from Lord of the Flies, Zarathustra preaching to those who wont listen and don't understand. For example... no-one else in my block (of 20 people) puts their recycling in the recycling bins... they put any trash anywhere, meaning nothing gets recycled. The seniors don't care and scoff at the idea of recycling and pointless, "who cares about recycling?", "who cares about the environment, I'll be dead!". Nonetheless, except when drunk and at their most moronic, I have friends here. Obviously I'd trust my life with them, and they'll do the same. Conversation is nearly always misogynistic, moronic, everyone reads The Sun. Although I get respect soemtimes for reading proper newspapers and for being the ... work-unit sage (although they don't know me well yet in that sense), I have next to nothing in common with anyone here! I've learned a lot... but I might give up on these reprobates and leave after a few years, rather than as long as I originally planned. If promotion goes well, I'll stay. Or maybe I'll move into the Information Systems department first and give that a go. Life plans are changing too, I'm wanting to buy a house and build a base for myself, so I can get more stuff done. Work takes up a lot of evenings and weekends. But at least I'm online! Tags: misogyny, trash culture, untermensch, workmates
Current Mood:  discontent
Listening To: "Der Prophet" by E Nomine
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My actualy job is quite satisfying... Taking things apart, fault-finding, soldering, swapping boards and bits of kit from box to box as a way of eliminating causes of faults, etc. Ordering spare parts. Lots of the kit is very heavy. The vehicles are massive, strong, varied. Paperwork, works registers, parts ordering and a whole room full of technical descriptions of every single piece of kit. It's a steep learning curve, lots of learn and lots to do. It's a bit dreamy :-) I done a fitness test this morning, done "average" in upper body but done well on the 2.4km run (1.5 miles), which I done in 9 minutes 6 seconds. Not my best time but I had no warning at all we'd be doing it, and had tracksuit bottoms on (heavy & hot), and haven't done much fitness stuff since Christmas. Um. Workmates are all very laddish, although it's very cool chatting and talking with the more intelligent & work-orientated ones. Snail mail takes ages to get here. Thanks to my friends for emailing me, it's one the few contacts I have with the outside world outside of work! Because snail mail takes so long I've hardly been talking to my girlfriend, who I miss! Tags: fitness, work, workmates
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Jogged 3 miles back from work... yay! I stopped jogging for a while because I wasn't sure if it was bad for my back. I'm still not sure, but it might be _good_ as long as I keep good posture while doing it. And was excited and bouncy whlist going to work too, because I get to walk through a large park with a lake and a cathedral in it, and it was VERY foggy, which is exciting and happy-inspiring. And I had a productive day at work! My fingers were posessed! Writing code that works all the time, first time round... my mind and fingers are at one with computers. I'm gradually learning other things at work... like managing our email server. I'm bad at network stuff... I just don't learn as fast or think in quite the right way when in comes to IP numbers, firewalls, networks... all that stuff! And it's dead lucky because I've been very busy lately! I'm so pleased that Kieran, an ex student and friend from Hertfordshire University who I am training, is naturally productive and keen to keep learning. Tags: fitness, fog, programming, workmates
Current Mood: Fit
Listening To: "Aquarello" by Ataraxia
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They were asking me about Furry and Satanism today. In a surprising moment Michael, the Technical Director, wanted to know how I combined Satanism and Furry. He reads some of my websites... but I think he never reads long essays. Kieran, the ex-student I am training up, also listened in. I knew Kieran at Hertfordshire Uni, he went to many of the alternative music nights. He's got his brain in the right place, I think. My response was to explain the "reverence" of animals in Furry... that we admire the way they are, and find that we can learn a very large amount from them. Saint Francis would be my Patron Saint if the position wasn't taken by Satan! Then to explain it in turns of Satanism it was a simple case of saying how Anton LaVey (original Black Pope of the Church of Satan) viewed Human's as being nothing more than animals... no spiritual higher-element... and that a height of intellectual honesty can be found when keeping in touch with your animal side... more in touch with your own emotions, needs. Without the humbling purity of admission of animal passions you can't achieve the emotional honesty required to facilitate your own ascension through life. Oh that's a whole load of typical Vexen automatic-garbage really! Tags: furry, satanism, workmates
Listening To: nce - Immolation
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